Women here, as always, like to say high what others think low. Many say that God does not like this or that, and put everything on the back of religion. Women here will take the bull by the horns by asking the pastor all kinds of questions about three main topics namely: abstinence before marriage, divorce in marriage, and financial management.
1-Regarding abstinence before marriage
It is said that God wants us to abstain from sexual relations until marriage and then indeed as the Bible says, we must abstain as Christians, because we do not have to worry about things to come. If, as some people say, we do not have a problem after marriage, God will provide.
And since sex has a hyper powerful power, abstaining from this will prevent us from falling into many traps. Let us refer to Proverb 31:3 of the Bible, which gives this advice to man: “Do not give your vigor to women, and your ways to those who lose kings.”
This is advice that has been given in order to prevent men from falling into sexual sin, and getting lost before marriage, just as it is advised, even recommended to the woman to do the same to avoid any problem and obviously enjoy her marriage in peace. The answer would therefore be affirmative with regard to the practice of abstinence before marriage.
2-On the question of divorce in marriage
The Bible says that a man should divorce his wife only when the latter has committed adultery (infidelity). So divorce should not be an option or a way out in a Christian’s marriage. As the pastor said, “If someone pushes you to sin, set yourself free.”
Always referring to the Bible that tells us to tear off our left eye, to cut off our right hand if this is what prevents us from being upright and makes us fall into sin, because it would be better to go to penguin heaven than to miss paradise for so little, we can therefore understand that in Christian marriage, it is mainly a question of not divorcing until the blame is on the woman for adultery.
If the partners get to know each other better before marriage, they will avoid divorce, because they will know the good and bad days of each, and will be able to adapt in order to have harmony in their couple. In the case, for example, of a man who beats his wife, it is understandable that he lacks communication and mutual knowledge established before marriage, which sometimes leads to violence of this kind in couples.
Women also addressed some issues in relation to marriage that fall under the dependence on in-laws to settle their differences in marriage.
Some couples claim the blessing of their in-laws on the fact that it is often said that if a couple does not receive the blessing of the parents, they will not be able to go far. In relation to this, the pastor affirms that although the blessing is welcome, it is also not necessary, for it is not they who marry, and they will not be those who will come to live in the home, which is why it is written in the book of Matthew 19:5 “that the man will leave his father and mother and will attach himself to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. Let man not separate what God has joined.”
Regarding the place of the housewife, the Bible asks the man “to love his wife, as Jesus Christ loved the church and to be the head of the woman as Christ is the head of the church.”
Regarding satisfaction as a cause of divorce, the pastor recommended that the woman satisfy her man, on mutual agreement, so that both are happy.
Some men, if their income permits, may grant the wife the right to spend her income for personal reasons, while they participate in household expenses, according to their will, an agreement between the wife and her husband, and especially based on the income of both spouses. Everything is to be decided, either a sharing or an allocation of respective expenses
In the event that one of the spouses loses his or her source of income, the other spouse could participate as best he or she can in order to provide for the household, as their union is “for better and for worse.”
Nevertheless, in the event that the laziness of one of the spouses occurs on the basis that the work is not up to his expectations or below his former job in case of loss of work, prayer must intervene as a flagship act in order to raise the pressure on the spouse and help him to get back on his feet. The discussion will also lighten this burden, because the pride of one of the spouses could stand in their way. In the event that one partner leaves the other due to job loss, it would mean that they are also willing to be done the same.
One of the questions that also arises is that of the “witchcraft” of our parents, which by actions could harm our spiritual evolution. There the pastor advises not to attack our parents, because they are our creators, and the acts that we would take against them, would go directly on us. Love, according to the Pastor, would be the best work, because for us, love would be the best shield, which would help us to overcome everything.
In general, we should understand that not only love, but also patience, knowledge of oneself and one’s partner are qualities and processes that one must acquire during the experience that will lead us to marriage. This course, although established or arrived at the stage of union, should not end there, because efforts must now be doubled in order to maintain cohesion and prevent each other from falling. Obviously, all this cannot be done without the help of prayer and our parents-in-law who, nevertheless, must not interfere in the matrimonial home for fear of disunity.